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Writer's pictureDr.Sazia Queyam,PT

How To Deal With Loneliness and Solitude



Have you been a victim to the feeling of melancholy gnawing away at your chest, despite being surrounded by a room full of people? Or have you struggled at times, when your only company has been yourself? It’s a feeling we’ve all gone through at some instances of our lives. And right now, with the nationwide lockdown, there is a widespread prevalence of solitude spreading amongst the masses. Here are our solutions on dealing with loneliness and solitude.





1. Understanding the root cause

Prior to treating the issue, a thorough understanding of the root-cause would help by giving you a permanent, rather than temporary solution. Take a moment to introspect, and see where this feeling of loneliness stems from. Has it always plagued you, right from a young age? Or is it a recent development, due to the changes in your surroundings? Whatever it is, the first step to dealing with it is to understand that the empty void you feel inside of you, is only as real as you make it seem in your head. 





2. Dealing with a change in environment

Oftentimes, the feeling of loneliness is due to a sudden, unexpected change in your daily environment. This could be either a breakup, a split in a friendship, or even a lockdown just as we’re facing today. A negative change requires a lot of adaptation. It’s human nature to panic, at first, and frantically try to piece your life back to the way it used to be, in a simple bid to regain normalcy. However, that is not always the right solution. A negative change can be nullified by a few positive changes. This includes distracting yourself in ways that will improve your lifestyle in a holistic manner. You can indulge yourself in a number of new hobbies such as reading, gardening or baking. With the internet at your fingertips, you can also take to learning new skills such as cooking, mastering a musical instrument, learning a new language, etc. 





3. Knowing your worth

The feeling of loneliness can also stem from a multitude of other reasons such as not being understood or not being heard. It does strike a chord with many of us when our opinions are not being taken seriously. In such cases, instead of berating yourself or being hard on your feelings, it helps to tell yourself that you are worth more. Hold your ground, in instances when it feels like people are trying to push you down. Diplomatically reason out with people regarding their behavior towards you, and tell them how it is that you would like to be treated. This gives you the newfound sense of being enough, and worthy. 





4. Indulging in self-care

Sticking with the theme of showing yourself what you're worth, loving and caring for yourself will also fill you up with a pleasant and bubbly warmth. Take some time off of your hectic schedule to unwind and relax. This can either be with the help of a warm bath, a calming foot-soak, hitting the sack early, taking care of your skincare or pampering yourself with the occasional sweet treat. Loneliness can also stem from the feeling of not being loved enough, and therefore, showering yourself with love will help keep the blues away. 





5. Engage in conversations

Been a long time since you last spoke to your school friends? It’s time you gathered the old gang and started talking. Catching up with friends and reminiscing about old memories will surely fill you up with a light, happy feeling. And this need not necessarily just be old friends. Talk to your current colleagues, relatives, college batchmates. And the conversation doesn’t have to be about your loneliness. You can have innovative, productive and engaging conversations about your ideas, your interests, and opinions. It’s nice to step out and find people who hold the same opinions as you. 







6. Join clubs/group activities

It would surprise you to know of the number of groups/club meetings that go on in your neighborhood or surrounding locality. Signing up for clubs that interest you can help you simultaneously nurture a passion for a new hobby and open up your horizon to new friendships. It would also be easy to engage in conversation with people interested in the same things as you. In times of a lockdown, explore the internet for the million online clubs that you can be a part of. 





7. Appreciate your own company

 Solitude does not directly translate to a negative connotation. Sometimes, an escape from the hustle and bustle of life is all you need to refresh your mind. Spending a few mindful moments alone, each day, helps you appreciate your company. You can spend this time journaling, scrapbooking, listening to music, etc. Your body and mind have been with you through all your battles in life, and so it is important to love it wholeheartedly, and know that you can be happy with just yourself.  





8. Reach out for help

At the end of the day, it is important to remember that sometimes, you are too entrenched in your feelings of loneliness, that you fail to realize that there are people who love and support you for who you are. And moreover, your own love can help you regain your confidence and overcome the feelings of melancholy. or an immediate response. 




Link for free helplines and online chat mental health services - (https://www.vandrevalafoundation.com)


At the end of the day, it is important to remember that sometimes, you are too entrenched in your feelings of loneliness, that you fail to realize that there are people who love and support you for who you are. And moreover, your own love can help you regain your confidence and overcome the feelings of melancholy. 

If you’re looking for training in the practice of nurturing and loving yourself, feel free to contact us for a free discovery session. We’ll be sure to train you in the best way possible, and you will emerge successful and confident. 


Join Sazia Queyam's Integrative Online Health Program

Contact:

✆  +91 9549444063

✉  coachsazia@gmail.com





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